I always end/start the new year with a key focal point. Some years it’s been about ramping things up. Others it’s been about being more profitable vs driving more revenue. This year it’s about being KIND….kind to myself whilst at the same time making sure that I’m not letting myself off the hook.
I’ve been pretty open over the years about my own mental health in an effort to be transparent and to lead. To let you know that even though we don’t always have our shit together, it’s ok to do what you need to do.
In years gone by, however, I’ve been really good at being an ostrich. Putting my head in the sand and ignoring everything I can in an effort to just keep going. To keep pushing. To keep doing. To keep striving. To keep ‘being’. To keep doing all of the things that are ‘necessary’ in order to grow ones’ business.
I don’t regret it.
Without the choices of days, weeks and years gone by, I wouldn’t be where I am today and sure as heck wouldn’t be the human I am today.
But as with most things, there are reasons and seasons for many things and this year is one I want to bring in a new season and a new way of doing things.
I just saw a picture on the internet of a 6 year olds’ drawing. Mum on the computer, child asking a question with the ‘no’ reponse in the caption.
I remember being the mother who was always working. From first thing in the morning till last thing at night. Running around like a train wreck 99% of the time . No time spent on me. Just trying to juggle everything.
I was determined to make my own way in business. I wanted to take over the world. Influence thousands – millions – of people. It was a noble goal… to help people is why I’m here. But I remember looking at the little faces of my little people and also making the choice that I wanted to be the other who set them a great example of how to chase your dreams and do things on your terms.
I learned kind of early on that I can be addicted to work. Addicted to the thrill of signing up someone new and helping them with the magical secret sauce that I have in me. I was addicted to the new heights. The dizzying volume of sales. The crazy numbers. Thrill of the chase. The fun and joy that was experienced when records were broken.
Until that wasn’t enough anymore.
For me, one of the big things that I realised I wanted more of, was more balance and more support. I didn’t want to work 3474387 hours per day 23423 days per week very month of every year.
The whole reason for starting this was to be able to spend more time with the kids, to do more, have more and be with them when they wanted and needed me to be, for as long as I could do that.
I had a wake up call in 2015-2016 where I made the decision to not travel so much. This was the result of some not so great stuff happening with one my children and I had the realisation that I had become very swept up in all the things and that the home team were being a bit let down, so to speak. So I didn’t travel as much. I tended to not travel for as long and really did as much as I could from here – the middle of nowhere!! – for as long as was necessary.
I miss the travel.
I miss going away and being in a different environment with different people and being immersed in in-the-room learning. I miss lots of things. But I am so glad I made the decisions that I did.
At the start of 2018 I decideded that I’d been missing a WHOLE TON of fun in my business and I declared ‘if it’s not fun I’m not doing it’. And I have lived most of the time by this motto relentlessly.
If you know anything about me, you’ll know that I am someone who deeply values living up to what they say. If I tell you something or if I commit to something, I do it full heartedly and will do everything in my power to follow through. Torture to me is having to tell someone I can’t do something I said I would. It’s true. I find it so damn hard.
Which is why I needed to have a solid heart to heart with myself towards the end of last year/early this year.
I have relentless for coming on 11 years with producing daily content. I have produced more than 500 daily live videos – which were done M-F with only Saturdays and Sundays off – plus more than 300 video blogs.
This year I had to think long and hard if I wanted to continue to do this.
And you know what, the answer was YES AND NO.
I am disciplined to do many things.
I am committed to doing many things.
But this year, I wanted to give myself permission to ROLL WITH THINGS and with how I FEEL.
Now, this commitment and permission is not be misconstrued for self-sabotage or something like that.
If I’m procrastinating on something, that’s a different story. I will whip my own ass for that! Hahhaa!!!
Each day I check in with myself and ask myself “what do I want to say?”; “how do I want to say it” and “How does it feel aligned to do it?”
This means, that on days like yesterday for instance, rather than feeling GUILTY for not doing The Coffee Run LIVE, I just let you know that I was having a day where I was dealing with my mental health. Anxiety. I gave myself permission to tap out from doing a LIVE or writing a blog for the day. I still did coaching sessions. I still answered questions.
But I kindly gave myself permission to not do EVERYTHING.
Today, for instance, I doesn’t feel aligned to do a livestream. I’m travelling on Sunday and have loads to arrange for that.
But I wanted to write to you and this is what came out.
I kindly gave myself permission to communicate today with you in the way that feels most aligned today…..
And writing is how that has happened to be today.
I don’t ever want you to feel like you HAVE to do something…
I want you to CHOOSE to do something because it feels aligned…
Or because it feels like the ‘right’ thing for you to do.
I believe that being kind to yourself requires discipline. In the same way that you have to have the discipline to show up at the gym each day. To work out. To exercise and move your body. To learn. To push through the barriers that our minds throw up every day.
Being kind to yourself requires practice. Grace. And disclipline.
I wonder what would happen this year if we were all a little more kind to ourselves.
Nic x
I am SUPER excited to announce as well that we have the Queen of Contentology running again in February 2021!! YES!!! Another chance to get back on the content train and to NAIL the competition.. and win a $1000?!!??!?! And a crown?!?!!?!? YES!!!
Can’t wait to see you all come into the new year absolutely SWINGING!!
Love ya xx
