I remember sitting in a glorious hotel room (that’s actually not true. It was a suite!) with a group of badass entrepreneurs and we were talking about alignment. I love it when I’m in a room of like-minded people. It makes my soul S I N G.
One of the activities that we were to do, was to be clear about where we were and where we wanted to be. We were advised to journal, write, type about what was happening and the things that felt out of alignment.
[LET’S BACKTRACK JUST FOR A SECOND]
I am a total Apple fiend. I love the brand; I love the tech and I LOVE pretty much everything about the products. It’s actually ridiculous the number of iPhones, iPads, iMacs, MacBook’s, MacBook airs, air pods and apple tv’s we have floating around the house!
It wasn’t always that way, though. I am, after all, a creature of habit and one who gets very ‘scared’ when I have to branch out into the land of the new. For example, when I worked at Westpac, everything was IBM based. My work laptop was that, so when I bought my own first desktop – for home use! – I chose IBM. When I bought my first laptop (man, that was such a huge decision!!) it was IBM. I knew my way around it all, and I liked what I knew.
The first time I used a mac was when I left the bank for a short sojourn to the Greener Grass over at Optus and they were all Apple-based. I was a bit shellshocked to have to learn how to use different systems and different programs! I LOVED it though once I got used to it.
When it came time to finally buy a new computer, many years later, my husband and I decided to branch into the world of Apple. I was so scared!! Seems silly at the time… but we bought it… and it sat in the box for 6 months or more!
Once I got it out though and familiarised myself with it, there was no holding back!
Every computer I’ve owned has since been Mac. I do believe I’ve probably tried every one possible! The Pro, The Air, the iMac plus all the accessories!!!!!
BUT…. The purchasing of the new computers didn’t happen until something went wrong with them. The same with my phones. The same with most things, actually, now that I think about it.
I never bought a new one just because I thought I could… or because a new model came out. It was always ‘when the thing died’…..
[OK, WE CAN COME BACK TO NOW]
On my way to the event, I was talking about at the start, I remember firing up my MacBook Pro. It had all the bells and whistles… but it would turn itself off. Randomly. Usually in the middle of writing a blog. Or in the middle of editing a video! It was so annoying.
It was S L O W. It was painful. And I tolerated it.
My phone, at around the same time, would overheat and die. It would lose its charge after about 4 hours! I always had to have a portable charger on the go with me, just in case. It would just go off when it said there was 30% left on it! I know. #Ridiculous!
But I would just tolerate it and put up with it. And deal with it.
So, I was sitting in this event, surrounded by amazing people… and as we were journalling, I was thinking about the things that had recently been pissing me off… I was thinking about the blog I was writing on the plane on the way there. I was thinking about how freaking annoying it was that my phone kept running out of charge. And how the heck was I supposed to be able to do my Livestreams when the phone would just nod off.
I realised with quite the metaphoric lightning bolt to the head, that I had been putting up with this for probably 6 months from each of these two devices.
I had the money to fix them or to upgrade them, yet I didn’t.
I had the ability to log onto a freaking website and make it happen! But I didn’t.
I hadn’t even consciously been putting up with it….
I remember looking at the amount of time that I had lost trying to reboot, trying to recharge and the frustration at that alone… there was probably an hour a day.
A WHOLE HOUR PER DAY
Over a week, that’s a whole day of work!!!!!!!
SEVEN HOURS PER WEEK!?!?!?
Oh, my goodness.
It was a huge revelation.
I decided then and there that it was out of alignment for me to put up with technology – which is the exact thing I need working if I want to make money the way that I do! It’s the thing I use to coach people on every single day!!!!!! – that doesn’t work.
I ordered my computer before leaving that event. I ordered my new phone before leaving that event. And the world was right again pretty soon after that!
It was insane how much faster the new computer was. It was amazing how much better the phone was….. and this was more because it was doing exactly what it was supposed to be doing!!!
Who would’ve thought?!?!?!? Hahhaha!
Last week I had an email from Apple. You know, as most of us probably get if we own Apple products! (I know I’m not the only one on the planet!). And in email it was talking about the new model MacBook Air.
And I realised as I was reading the email, that this computer that I’m literally typing on now has become a bit glitchy and I keep getting notifications about running out of storage! Because of my nails and the way that I type, it’s impossible to tell the lettering on the keys of at least 3 of the letters. That part is purely aesthetic, though! I touch type so I don’t even need to see the letters – but they look worn.
Other than that, though, this computer has been AMAZING! I realised it’s a good 2+ years on, though since I upgraded it.
I went to the Apple store and was checking out the computers. Added the specs that I wanted, added it to the bag…. And then shut the window down.
“Your computer is really not that bad. It’s working ‘fine’. You don’t really need it”
And…..
“You can just remove some things from the local drive and you’ll find more storage that way”….
And… “It’s not dead yet! Why don’t you wait another six months? You know when you get your new one, they’ll release another new model within about 8 months. You could just wait till then”….
I forgot about it for a few days.
Then, I got another email from Apple reminding me about their new things.
So, I went back and opened the link, went through the motions and added it to cart….
But I sat for a while.
I thought about it.
I felt anxious. All the stuff came up about not really needing it. Not really having to replace this one.
And then the doozy “Why do you think you really deserve it?”…..
WHAAAAAAAAT!?!!?
I realised what was really going on.
Because I’ve got the money to invest in a new machine. It wasn’t that.
I know logically that having more memory and more speed will actually save me time.
But neither of those things really mattered….’
I asked myself if working away on a computer until it ‘died’ was in alignment with how I wanted to be, and I got a HELL NO!
I asked myself what was really going on, and it all came down to deserving..
Or rather, me feeling in that moment that I didn’t really deserve a new computer. That I didn’t really need a new computer. “What about all those people who hobble away on the computers they have forever! Who do you think you are?”
Crazy. Town.
I asked myself “What is in alignment right now” and the response was almost a literal broadcast from the booming voice of the Universe: “Buy the fucking computer”!!!!!
And so, I did. Without guilt. Without feeling bad. Without worry.
Just ‘buy the fucking computer’.
Isn’t it funny the things we tell ourselves about what we deserve and why…? Or what we don’t deserve and why.
I have been noticing more and more the things I put up with because ‘Things aren’t dead yet’. Cutlery. I replaced my cutlery for the first time in years last year. I bought new pots and pans as well! I know! #SHOCKING. They should have been replaced years ago, but they were ‘fine’ and ‘still doing their job’.
I don’t ever want to be ‘wasteful’. It doesn’t fit with my values.
But for goodness sakes… it’s not like I buy things like that and then throw it away! Hahaha!
I don’t need to justify to myself that the computer gets used probably 6-7-8 hours a day. I don’t need to justify that I need it to be fast so I can upload things, download things and record things quicker so I am more efficient.
I bought myself a new freaking computer because that was what was aligned.
I bought myself a new computer without this one dying because I DESERVE to have a computer that is aligned!!!!
I bought myself a new computer because I could.
The big question I have for you, is what are you tolerating because you have a set of rules around when you can do something? Or not do something? Or invest in? Or not invest in?
Are those rules serving you?
What is out of alignment…. And what are you going to do about it?
I’m off to order my new phone cause this one is driving me up the freaking wall!
Nic x
