There’s been a HUGE upheaval in the world with the way that we entrepreneurs get to do things. Pre-Covid we had the choice to do things online, offline, in person, big events, little ones, do them locally, interstate and internationally.
I’ve been struggling a little, I must admit, these past few months. Struggling with motivation and energy. Struggling with doing what is normally easy for me.
My bestie pointed it out. She said, “You’re grieving”. I’ve been pondering on that, too.
As a child, I dreamed of being in a room with people. Of being on stage. Of being on tv. Of entertaining in some way shape or form.
I dreamed of touring the country and the world. I dreamed of big city lights and the wide stretch of sky in the country lit up by the stars and the moon.
It all felt like endless and limitless possibilities.
As an adult, after eventually finding my way in business some 11+ years ago, some of those dreams came true. Actually, most of them! It didn’t look like how I thought it would as a kid when I was dreaming it all up, but here we are!
At the end of 2019 I was SO in the zone! I had done my first National Tour. I had plans for a new book that I was about to start writing. I was travelling overseas speaking, I was travelling nationally speaking. I was running small and larger events. Smaller and larger online programs. It was the perfect mix. Online. Offline. Hybrid. In person.
Then we hit into 2020 and the world went nuts!
I think for many (especially Victorians in Australia) we went into survival mode for much of the year. Not just with the business, but personally. Home schooling. Lockdown, release, lockdown, easing, lockdown, somewhat easing, lockdowns again. This took us into 2021.
It’s July. We’ve had bouts of lockdowns. We’ve had restrictions. We’ve been shut out of all states in the Country at various times – not to mention the whole country essentially being banned from the rest of the world.
So yes. I have been grieving. Funny how my friend is always right, right?
And we’re still in fight or flight mode. I think we’re all hyper-vigilant. I’m speaking for Victorians now. And the hyper-vigilance is around constantly trying to make plans with what’s going on, then having backup plans for the backup plans. 80% of the plans have been cancelled. The backup plans had been cancelled. The backup plan feels like a consolation prize.
From the conversations I’ve been having with clients, I know that this is not just me. It’s not just where I am. It’s everywhere.
And it can be tough some days .. and tougher on other days… and ‘easy’ on others.
The point is this: for many of us, we built our own businesses, so we’d have FREEDOM. Freedom to do things in the way we want, and we can’t always do that now.
I’ve been a huge advocate and voice for years about doing things the way you want. With who you want. Doing the things that light you up. Doing things in the way that you were born to do them.
And I think this is where I’ve been challenged somewhat. My ultimate is to do things in a hybrid fashion. Some things in the room and some things online. Which creates a tug and pull with integrity…. My integrity. Because frankly, I haven’t been able to do things in the way that I want.
I’ve literally done 2 in-person events in 20 months. Perhaps a little longer. TWO. That’s it.
I think I have seen my bestie twice in that time, too. She lives in a different state. Which is now locked down.
So yes, I’ve been grieving, and I didn’t really until now, know how to talk about it.
So, I figured I’d just come clean.
For me, Integrity is my top value. My top top TOP value. And I’ve been feeling like what I’ve been saying and promoting (do the work you LOVE in the way you want to do it) is something I haven’t been living of late in 100% of the way that I have in the past.
So here’s what I’ve been focussed on:
- Doing what I can do and doing what’s in my control
- Revelling in the work that I’m doing. I love my clients and I love what they’re doing.
- I love coaching. Love. It.
- Sticking to my routines. 5am up and attem with a 4km walk on the treadmill. 6am client calls where I kick their ass into gear for the day! Then going to the gym and kicking my ass there. Then getting stuck into the day.
And I have added back in the writing in the journal. Journalling in the things that I WANT.
Unequivocally.
Without guilt.
Without reprimanding myself.
Without telling myself it’s not possible.
Writing in, journaling in, what I FREAKING WANT.
What is that YOU want?
Do you want to travel?
Do you want to coach?
Do you want squillions of dollars?
Do you want freedom?
I’ve been guilty of dallying around in the ‘this is fucked’ mindset for a bit too long.
I’ve told myself and written to myself that that’s enough now.
That’s. Enough. Now.
Write in what you want.
Dream about what you want.
Screw the reality for a while and live in the dreamy manifestation land of what you WANT.
What do you want? Full stop. No returns.
You’ll be surprised at what comes out of that time you spend.
There are cracks in the dreams that let in the ideas… cracks in the walls that we put up that let the light of The Way Forward through.
Take time to grieve.
Take time to be okay.
Then get back up on the freaking horse already and make whatever you want to happen, happen.
It might look a little different for the time being while the world does its weird world thing.
Let this be a practice in patience.
In trust.
In faith.
Yes. This is as much for me today as it is for you.
Just remember you’ve got this, m’kay?
You’ve. Fucking. Got. This.
And as always, remember The World Is Ready For Your Brand of Awesome.
Nic x
Want to start some new routines to make way for this stuff to come through for you too? For you to get to the end of the day feeling and knowing that you’ve achieved? Want a wingman who gets it… so that you’re no longer going at it alone? Join us in the 4-week iLab (Implement Like A Boss) challenge. Starts Monday for you!
